I'm just being rubbish because I havent had to motivate myself yet today. S did nags this morning, so I havent HAD to get up and moving yet. Wish I'd done them, it looks like it's going to rain any second, FH will be wet. In fact, I know it's going to rain, I've just put some washing out.
I've just paid some money off my credit card so am feeling marginally less horrified by that. Marginally. At least I'm using everything though, it's not just pointless rubbish!! Hope my bodyshop stuff comes soon.
I want to know when I get to see this weight loss. Logically I know I have lost weight and therefore size, but I dont SEE it and I know no one believes me and they're getting infuriated but I genuinely dont. This is why I'm scared for if I ever get the money to have the surgery I covet, who's to say I'll feel any better? I might not like it on principle (I'm that sort of person) or I might STILL not see any difference.
I had the oddest dream last night as well, it's made me feel a bit weird. I must get back in touch with the ex about the divorce, but I dont really have the money to at the minute. Plus I want to look amazing. Not because I want him back, but because I just...do. I can't explain why.
All rubbish and I can't even explain how I feel properly. Gymming tonight with Fanny. I can't decide if it's going to be a washout or if it's all ok. I might go a bit earlier and get on the treadmill before she gets there.
