I really must stop spending so much money, especially in light of everything...
Show today, went with works tradestand - took the whole stock of dog beds and we were SO busy!! We must have taken about £500, which considering at the same show last year, we took £7 is going some lol. I got some bargains from the Joules stand (:thud: there was a Joules stand!) and got a summerweight pale blue rugby top which was £50 reduced to £25 and a neon pink jacket which was £85 reduced to £40. Bargainous. Also some red jewelled flip flops which will go well with jeans and my boobs out red top. Must do something about the state of my feet though!
Had a horrendous day food wise. I took a salad, but there was so much temptation everywhere....
Food: 1 bacon sandwich, 1 cheeseburger, chips and tomato sauce, 4 donuts, 2 hot chocolates with whipped cream, 2 bowls crunchy nut cornflakes, 1 turkish delight, quavers, muller light, salad (ham/mozzerella/halloumi/salad cream).
Exercise: I walked down to the show and then back home (about 25mins total) and have done 200 calories on the bike so far.
The huge loss I managed over the last 2/3 days has been totally wiped out. Bah.
Saturday 19 May 2007
Friday 18 May 2007
Annoyed with Myself
Must not be overexcited about Hypothetically, Potentially, but Hypothetically, Potentially, SOMETHING *MAY* be happening around the beginning of Juneish time. Possibly.
Had such a lovely sleep last night, I was utterly exhausted from the night before, and could happily have slept for days. OH on the other hand, didnt, and was wide awake from around 4am.
Work wasnt too bad, still can't concentrate, and still occasionally had to run in the office, shut the door, scream quietly, and come back out again lol. Undecided re the Pony Situation. I dont feel I have been the unreasonable one, but then, I wouldnt, would I? I really dont know what to do, or how to feel. One minute I am over excited about having her back, planning stuff, looking round yards, trying to work out when is best for me to have her... The other side, thinks 'fuck, how am I going to pay for all this? Its not in pony's best interests, I hated that yard, why am I thinking of going back, I wasn't confident on her in a Dr Bristol & a flash, how will I feel with a cheltenham gag and a grackle?' etcetc. The best situation is if the loaner buys her now, but somehow doubt that will happen. At worst, will just have to give her 6months off, get a friend to ride then sell before winter - I cannot afford her. Its a horrible decision, but I have proved I cannot cope with her still being mine and somewhere else. Best if she belongs to someone else and I cut all ties.
So been totally unable to concentrate all day - head is partway Somewhere Down South, partway in the office talking to the owner, partly on the W&C order, partly on the yards I'm going to look at... Basically everywhere it shouldnt be.
Building work is coming on. Wall is totally out now, and beam is in. The metal things holding it all up should come out on Monday, and hopefully the shop wont fall down. Then I think the office is being pulled down, then the counter is moving....then the front is coming off the shop. I wish we'd taken pics, because it will all look so different.
Still havent been to gym or swimming. Another piggy day.
Went to Drs, apparently weight gain is very normal, and although she didnt weigh me (dont they learn?!) accepted I had lost weight, and said it was good, although she could imagine how disheartening it was that it was going so slowly. Suggested the coil as another option. I dont think it is one I will take up. Said the periods thing was totally normal.
Food: 1 bacon & mushroom & brown sauce bun, 1 slice pizza, salad (ham/mozzerella/halloumi/salad cream) muller light, 2 rice cakes with laughing cow light, 1 ham & pie d'angloys sandwich, 1 chocolate muffin, chicken, yorkshire pudding, green beans, carrots, boiled potatoes, cranberry sauce, half bottle pink wine.
Exercise: Nowt. Nada. Bugger all.
Had such a lovely sleep last night, I was utterly exhausted from the night before, and could happily have slept for days. OH on the other hand, didnt, and was wide awake from around 4am.
Work wasnt too bad, still can't concentrate, and still occasionally had to run in the office, shut the door, scream quietly, and come back out again lol. Undecided re the Pony Situation. I dont feel I have been the unreasonable one, but then, I wouldnt, would I? I really dont know what to do, or how to feel. One minute I am over excited about having her back, planning stuff, looking round yards, trying to work out when is best for me to have her... The other side, thinks 'fuck, how am I going to pay for all this? Its not in pony's best interests, I hated that yard, why am I thinking of going back, I wasn't confident on her in a Dr Bristol & a flash, how will I feel with a cheltenham gag and a grackle?' etcetc. The best situation is if the loaner buys her now, but somehow doubt that will happen. At worst, will just have to give her 6months off, get a friend to ride then sell before winter - I cannot afford her. Its a horrible decision, but I have proved I cannot cope with her still being mine and somewhere else. Best if she belongs to someone else and I cut all ties.
So been totally unable to concentrate all day - head is partway Somewhere Down South, partway in the office talking to the owner, partly on the W&C order, partly on the yards I'm going to look at... Basically everywhere it shouldnt be.
Building work is coming on. Wall is totally out now, and beam is in. The metal things holding it all up should come out on Monday, and hopefully the shop wont fall down. Then I think the office is being pulled down, then the counter is moving....then the front is coming off the shop. I wish we'd taken pics, because it will all look so different.
Still havent been to gym or swimming. Another piggy day.
Went to Drs, apparently weight gain is very normal, and although she didnt weigh me (dont they learn?!) accepted I had lost weight, and said it was good, although she could imagine how disheartening it was that it was going so slowly. Suggested the coil as another option. I dont think it is one I will take up. Said the periods thing was totally normal.
Food: 1 bacon & mushroom & brown sauce bun, 1 slice pizza, salad (ham/mozzerella/halloumi/salad cream) muller light, 2 rice cakes with laughing cow light, 1 ham & pie d'angloys sandwich, 1 chocolate muffin, chicken, yorkshire pudding, green beans, carrots, boiled potatoes, cranberry sauce, half bottle pink wine.
Exercise: Nowt. Nada. Bugger all.
Thursday 17 May 2007
Hypothetically, Potentially
No reply to apology. :( I really dont know what to say or do. Have a list of 20 yards to ring round in the morning. I really dont want to go back to where she was before, but if I have to, I have to. I suppose its better the devil you know really.
Had very little sleep last night, about 4 hours max. Meant that I couldnt get too worked up about today, until Owner actually arrived. I've been left a little bit :huh: and *dizzy* over the review. Basically, I have come out of it looking great, which was a shock! I underestimated myself on everything. M1 did some very political voting and gave everybody horrific scores.... Had it not been for that, my overall score would have been a good 4.5-5 (out of 6) rather than the steady 4 it was. The funniest thing I have EVER heard, is that he gave everyone 2/3 for time keeping - and gave himself 4s & 5s :heehee: This is the man that regularly rocks up at 9.45am, then goes to the bank at 10am, gets back at 11am, and goes for a 3 hour lunch at midday. I can only assume he thought he was marking 1 as the highest LOL. Hypothetically, Potentially, IF eithers M1,2 or 3 were to leave, there will be a new position created for someone (me) to move into. Hypothetically, Potentially, Someone might be leaving in 3weeks time. This means a hefty payrise, lots more input and responsibility, a salary, rather than the rota (no more overtime, boo), so Hypothetically, Potentially, keep those fingers crossed for a while longer. It totally hasnt sunk in yet, I keep wondering if I have made it up. I cant let myself get too overexcited for another 3 weeks. However, I have already mentally spent the money!
Spent most of the day eating chocolate and biscuits. Am pissed off now, as there was a significant loss this morning. Didnt go to gym either as was exhausted by the time I finished work. Am also shocked at the 'comedown' I had at 4pm - I havent had such an amount of chocolate for so long, and that combined with the review and last night, meant that come 4pm I was exhausted and physically couldnt do anything more taxing than chat to builders.
Food: Quavers, salad (ham/mozzerella/salad cream), 1 chocolate muffin, lots of chocolate hobnobs, 1 packet of Planets, some Hula Hoops, some Aero bubbles most of a pack of Rolos, pizza, garlic bread.
Exercise: Nothing. At all.
Had very little sleep last night, about 4 hours max. Meant that I couldnt get too worked up about today, until Owner actually arrived. I've been left a little bit :huh: and *dizzy* over the review. Basically, I have come out of it looking great, which was a shock! I underestimated myself on everything. M1 did some very political voting and gave everybody horrific scores.... Had it not been for that, my overall score would have been a good 4.5-5 (out of 6) rather than the steady 4 it was. The funniest thing I have EVER heard, is that he gave everyone 2/3 for time keeping - and gave himself 4s & 5s :heehee: This is the man that regularly rocks up at 9.45am, then goes to the bank at 10am, gets back at 11am, and goes for a 3 hour lunch at midday. I can only assume he thought he was marking 1 as the highest LOL. Hypothetically, Potentially, IF eithers M1,2 or 3 were to leave, there will be a new position created for someone (me) to move into. Hypothetically, Potentially, Someone might be leaving in 3weeks time. This means a hefty payrise, lots more input and responsibility, a salary, rather than the rota (no more overtime, boo), so Hypothetically, Potentially, keep those fingers crossed for a while longer. It totally hasnt sunk in yet, I keep wondering if I have made it up. I cant let myself get too overexcited for another 3 weeks. However, I have already mentally spent the money!
Spent most of the day eating chocolate and biscuits. Am pissed off now, as there was a significant loss this morning. Didnt go to gym either as was exhausted by the time I finished work. Am also shocked at the 'comedown' I had at 4pm - I havent had such an amount of chocolate for so long, and that combined with the review and last night, meant that come 4pm I was exhausted and physically couldnt do anything more taxing than chat to builders.
Food: Quavers, salad (ham/mozzerella/salad cream), 1 chocolate muffin, lots of chocolate hobnobs, 1 packet of Planets, some Hula Hoops, some Aero bubbles most of a pack of Rolos, pizza, garlic bread.
Exercise: Nothing. At all.
Wednesday 16 May 2007
Having Her Back
Both Yay! and Nay!
I'm pleased to have her back, but also, I hate the way it has ended. We were both at fault and neither will accept full responsibility. Need to find a yard now.
Havent swum tonight.
Food: boiled potatoes, sausages, beans, carrots, gravy, chocolate, quavers, salad (ham/mozzerella/salad cream), muller light.
Exercise: None. A mini walk on chevin while trying to contact V and then gabbing to Corinna for a bit.
I'm pleased to have her back, but also, I hate the way it has ended. We were both at fault and neither will accept full responsibility. Need to find a yard now.
Havent swum tonight.
Food: boiled potatoes, sausages, beans, carrots, gravy, chocolate, quavers, salad (ham/mozzerella/salad cream), muller light.
Exercise: None. A mini walk on chevin while trying to contact V and then gabbing to Corinna for a bit.
Tuesday 15 May 2007
:thud: A Reply!!
At midnight last night and :S dunno.
'Is everything ok? I've just seen post on the forum :S I sent you a txt the day before yesterday, didnt you get it? And I went to the internet cafe but you went offline. Havent spoken to the vet re Dectomax but visit is already booked and she did say at the time no other treatment available. Have to work on Sunday. If you come Monday, I have 2 hours off over lunch but not allowed holidays yet as only been here a couple of weeks. You can come and see her on your own no probs, no one will bother you and can definately skive for half an hour or so :)'
So, hmmm. At 2am I came to the conclusion I *may* tell her the sale is off (there is nothing in writing as such to say M was ever offered for sale) and update the contract, put in a few more specific clauses.
Am still yet to reply to the text. Not sure what to put. No weight loss.
----
9.30pm. replied, saying I didnt like the fact I'd sent 7 messages to her 1 reply, and re-asked all the questions I asked in previous texts. Still waiting for an answer. She's been online.
Food: salad (ham, mozzerella, salad cream), quavers, grapes, 2 mini yorkie bars, half a packet maltesers (:blush:), limey chicken, pilau rice, 6 biscuits
Exercise: 50 lengths in the pool
'Is everything ok? I've just seen post on the forum :S I sent you a txt the day before yesterday, didnt you get it? And I went to the internet cafe but you went offline. Havent spoken to the vet re Dectomax but visit is already booked and she did say at the time no other treatment available. Have to work on Sunday. If you come Monday, I have 2 hours off over lunch but not allowed holidays yet as only been here a couple of weeks. You can come and see her on your own no probs, no one will bother you and can definately skive for half an hour or so :)'
So, hmmm. At 2am I came to the conclusion I *may* tell her the sale is off (there is nothing in writing as such to say M was ever offered for sale) and update the contract, put in a few more specific clauses.
Am still yet to reply to the text. Not sure what to put. No weight loss.
----
9.30pm. replied, saying I didnt like the fact I'd sent 7 messages to her 1 reply, and re-asked all the questions I asked in previous texts. Still waiting for an answer. She's been online.
Food: salad (ham, mozzerella, salad cream), quavers, grapes, 2 mini yorkie bars, half a packet maltesers (:blush:), limey chicken, pilau rice, 6 biscuits
Exercise: 50 lengths in the pool
Monday 14 May 2007
Nearly 36 hours later
I still dont have a reply! I sent another text at around 7pm as well, no reply to that either.There are Plans in place!
Went to gym this eve, but didnt manage whole routine - it was PACKED. Will try not to go on a Monday evening again I think, it was so busy. Or if I do go, will go later than tonight. Didnt get on rower, leg press,seated row or pec flies.
Finally have an almost date for my review! Either Wednesday or Thursday morning.Starting to prepare my speech.
Food: salad (ham & salad cream), yoghurt, quavers, maltesers, tomato and pasta bake, HUGE garlic bread, banoffi pie (bought when I thought I was going to do whole gym routine!)
Exercise: Gym, 60 sit ups
Went to gym this eve, but didnt manage whole routine - it was PACKED. Will try not to go on a Monday evening again I think, it was so busy. Or if I do go, will go later than tonight. Didnt get on rower, leg press,seated row or pec flies.
Finally have an almost date for my review! Either Wednesday or Thursday morning.Starting to prepare my speech.
Food: salad (ham & salad cream), yoghurt, quavers, maltesers, tomato and pasta bake, HUGE garlic bread, banoffi pie (bought when I thought I was going to do whole gym routine!)
Exercise: Gym, 60 sit ups
Sunday 13 May 2007
Hiccups!
Had them since about 4pm, they stopped while I was at the gym but have not started again - but I HAVE eaten my tea very quickly!
Odd day, lots of texts sent, but none in return. Still waiting for a reply from one I sent 10hours ago. Sigh.
Did a bit less at the gym today - 15minutes on treadmill (after 11 warmup), 15 on cross trainer and 10 on rower, then weights. I feel like I've worked though!!
Food: salad (ham/cheddar/salad cream), muller light, quavers, pasta bake with pork and tomato, garlic bread
Exercise: gym, 20 sit ups
Odd day, lots of texts sent, but none in return. Still waiting for a reply from one I sent 10hours ago. Sigh.
Did a bit less at the gym today - 15minutes on treadmill (after 11 warmup), 15 on cross trainer and 10 on rower, then weights. I feel like I've worked though!!
Food: salad (ham/cheddar/salad cream), muller light, quavers, pasta bake with pork and tomato, garlic bread
Exercise: gym, 20 sit ups
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